This one time I was stuck in the middle of a spot, man, me and your tio, and this was back in, woooo, a long, long time ago. We're talking way back. Well, we were on the stroll and we came up on this dude, man, laid out. Out! This being some bad parts of town, mejo. So don't you or your brothers or your friends ever go down there. So this guy, we thought he just fell out, you know? So your tio kicks him side of his head and he don't move! Right away we're ready to break out, you know, before the cops come and try to bust us up and try and play it up like it was us that did it. So we keep walking, and this dude comes up to me, like whispering, you know. He had these evil, almost red eyes, almost like an animal? And he says, 'Hey, hey, compadre. Come 'ere. I gotta deal for you. I'll sell you my friend over there.' First I wasn't sure what to think. I looked at your tio, and he throws me a look like, freak this cat, lets break out! Ha ha! So messing, I was like, 'How much for him?' And the guy goes, 'Hundred bucks. Or anything you got.' By then your tio was pretty creeped out, and so was I! So we split, kept on walking the boulevard. Good thing we didn't have that hundred bucks, though. 
J, man, where you at? Where you at when I say where you at? Where you at, Big J? You know how by the old house there's this place where they sell fittings, like brass and chrome? Brass and chrome bath fittings? I was standing there with my old partner from back then, and this car comes screaming around the corner, rolls up on us as we're carrying some stuff 'cuz you know how we were gonna do some work on Grandma's bathroom. So this car, a '78 Buick Riviera, screams at us. My partner breaks out. So I'm stuck there, holding these fittings like an idiot and the dude driving, leaps out, big dude, probably Apache, and he catches up with my friend and for no reason at all knocks that boy out. Out! And I'm standing there, watching all this go down. And the dude gets back inside the Riviera and takes off. Meanwhile, that guy I know is laid out in the middle of the street. He gets up and there's like twenty-five people all there, who all just saw what happened, you know? And my partner, my partner, he goes, 'Where's that guy? Where's the Buick?' And I was like, 'Who knows, let's get,' you know? And all these people who were watching what happened there in the street come up to us, and they say, 'Why'd your boy fall? Did he trip? Does he have seizures?' And we were like, 'Did you grab that license? Is he from the neighborhood?' And they were like 'Who? Is who from the neighborhood?' And we were like, 'Dude in the Buick!' And nobody knew or saw anything, like my friend just fell all by himself. Like all that never happened. Twenty-five people and nobody saw a Buick or Apache or nothing. Alright so one time me and your Tio F were out and looking for girls, you know? And this guy, this guy comes up to us and tells us this story about how he caught a case for who knows what, his homeboy did something for something i don't know, and we're just listening, you know? We ain't got crap to do.Your Tio looks at his arms, and says, "What does that say on you hand? BEST? The BEST?""Beast," says the dude. "The Beast.""Whoa," I say. Kinda creeped out, you know!Just then, this gigantic dog come up runnin, runnin down the block right at us! And dude tellin' the story is cool all the way, except he brings his fist up like he's gonna sock somebody? And this dog is flying down the sidewalk. I play the fence and I turn around and your Tio is on the hood of a car! And dude is still playing cool, and the only thing he does, he hunches a little bit over, and the dog leaps up! Up, and the dude reaches back and kicks the dog right in the face, in the eyes. And the dude must've pulled a hamstring or something because he's leaning on the fence next to where I am, and he's screamin and holding like right here? Like right behind the knee? And the dog is all jacked up, and he's licking his face and whining and leaning against the fence, too.And we split! What else you think we gonna do? We aint about to stick around and see what else come down that sidewalk. Sheeee-it, man.